Friday, January 11, 2013

Knead the dough

I went back to the chiro yesterday.  That was interesting.  They threw me on a hydro-massage bed before treatment.  Ever seen or been on one of those?  It looks similar to this...



As I was being kneaded from below and jiggling around I was reminded of the phrase "it must be jelly 'cause jam don't shake like that."  It was fine the first few minutes then it got irritating and I was glad it was over.  Johnny Angel...err...Dr B. came over and took me back to the room.  All I could think of was how bad I wished I'd let one fly on the way into the office since I ate breakfast before I came in.  I was just glad I had to sit on my rump and pray there wasn't the sound of a huge implosion while he worked my muscles.  Then he said "I'm going to have you lay on your belly."  Are you friggin' serious!??  I wanted to say "for your own safety, you don't want me to do that."  I immediately got the vision of him with no eyebrows from the methane explosion brewing.  I prayed and laid down.  Thankfully I wasn't in that position too long but long enough to make me not want to eat before appointments from now on.  Yeah, sorry.  I share too much but don't act like you haven't gone to the gynie or some other doctor and had that panic sweat set in when you feel Mr. Methane trying to ruin your day.

Is it any surprise I kept a daily diary to bring with me?  Of course not.  The receptionist said I'm the 2nd person of all of their patients to do that and he would love it.  He did.  He was almost giddy over it.  I aim to please.  He said he's encouraged by what he's seeing and that some of the new soreness is from the strengthening exercises he's having me do.  He said he's convinced a lot of this is musculature and affecting the nerves.   He worked the same muscles that he did before and then when I told him the top of my foot down to my toe was crampy and tight he said he was going to check the muscles in the front of my shin and work them.  Oh. My. Lord!  The last time I felt pain like that was when the Mr and I were dating.  We were play fighting and I went to kick at him and he blocked me and my shin hit his foot at full force.  It felt like dragging a rolling pin down the front of my shin.  I gasped and he said "yeah, you're REALLY tight, this isn't going to be pleasant the first few passes as we loosen this up."  I bit my lip and the more he worked it, the more I laughed because it was so excruciating and I swore I wasn't going to cry this time.  I kept apologizing for being such a wuss and he said I was fine.  Oh man, I thought that pain would make me limp outta there.  But within about 3 minutes it was basically gone.  He showed me some stretches I can do for the fascia since the arches want to cramp from the strengthening exercises and one of them brought instant relief.  Then he lasered my feet in the problem areas and that was about it.  He wants me to keep testing how long I walk to see if I can clock more time since I'm currently up to an hour before my feet say "mmm, I don't think so."  I already feel slight improvement in the "catching" I felt just above the arch and across the top of the foot.  The bad news is it's those horrible, painful stretches that are likely responsible for it!  So I'm going to do some massage to the front of the leg after every workout, well everyday so that I can be prepared next week.

This week could be a big stride week for me if his suspicions are correct and the muscles are the main issue. Depending on my diary from this week, he may put me in vibration therapy which is considered the rehab phase over the 'healing' phase.  At that point, I think he'd re-evaluate the following week and then determine if I'm able to add light low impact back in.  I told him about the Tae Bo I did Wednesday night where I stood for any upper body movement standing still and only doing squats (which he pre-approved) and since I had no issues the following day before the appointment, he wasn't concerned.  So I may be able to throw one of those in each week until I'm cleared for low impact.  These strengthening exercises and soft tissue massage will be part of the rest of my life.  He has already seen vast improvement in the pliability of my foot thanks to my trusty spiky ball so I'm hoping to do the same with my legs for next week.

Moving in the right direction!  I guess that means I am now required to window shop for medical purposes.  What a shame!

Have you ever gone through the issues I experienced at a docs visit?  (Jiggling on machines, impending flatulence or having a maneuver done on you that made you jump out of your skin.)

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14 comments:

  1. Great to hear you're doing better.

    And yes, I've gone through the "fart is a brewing" thing at doctor's office (and at yoga--some of those yoga moves just wring the stink right out of you). And many times at the chiro he'd adjust something and I'd let out a very un-ladylike grunt or gasp. It happens pretty regularly when the doc is adjusting your shoulder/back area and really gives your bod a hard shove. No amount of preparing can keep you from grunting like a pig ole hog.

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    1. Thanks! I can't even imagine doing yoga in a class setting. I'd be bombing left and right. Yeah, I'd say my chiro heard an unladylike gasp yesterday! He's lucky my reflex didn't get him kicked in the face.

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  2. So glad you have some more positive reinforcement from the doctor that you are healing up properly.

    The only thing I worry about when going to the doctor is having to have the doctor check the man parts, since my doctor is female. Yeah, that would be embarrassing to suddenly stand at full attention when she is down there checking things out. Luckily she is not the most attractive woman but I still have to clear my thoughts.

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    1. Me too!! Yeah no offense to her but she's not your type so I have NO worries about chubbage.

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  3. I'm glad you're showing so much improvement so quickly. I just hope this week nets you as much healing. Sounds like this guy is exactly what you needed. I don't worry too much about the methane problem. I mean I don't eat beans before an appointment or anything, but I feel like worry about it will be kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy so I try not to think about it. I'm pretty sure doctors are used to it though, and they know it's all biology and that their patients can't always hold it in. Especially when they are manipulating the muscles of said patients.

    Have a great weekend!

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    1. It's definitely more healing that what was occurring with the sage advice of rest, ice, elevate until it goes away. *rolling eyes* I'm sure they're used to it but you also don't want "farter" to be written in your file either. ;)

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  4. I'm glad to know that things are getting better! I can't wait to share your gas issues with my coworker who just started seeing the chiropracter this week; I'm sure she's going to laugh!!

    Keep celebrating the progress!!

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    1. HA! I hope she gets a kick out of my potential misfortune.

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  5. Your methane paragraph was so funny I had to read it twice to enjoy the belly laugh. Then I got another one over the Mr.'s response. Reminded me of the glee I felt when my hubby had to go to a female proctologist because all the men in the practice were at some kind of convention. Glee because he has NEVER been sympathetic to my complaints about gyno appointments. Yeah, I've had the methane-fear moments, too, don't we all? Not so much at the doctor's office, but when I get a massage, if the urge crops up it's excruciating!

    Thanks for the early-morning laugh!

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    1. Glad I could give ya a laugh, well both of us could. :) The Mr goes to my gynie appts (not the exam!) and then we get to go shopping afterward since I had to have metal in there. It's a pretty even trade. I've never had a massage and half of it is for that reason! I don't want the pressure of being on my gut to force anything out!

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  6. Oh my god, I'm dying laughing! I've been in that situation many times myself, but it's funnier when hearing someone else talk about it and then your Mr.'s comment was all sorts of WIN, too. Thanks for the Friday Funny!

    YAY for making so much progress on your feet/legs. This is awesome news. Have a GREAT weekend! ~Krista

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  7. I'd never even considered the gas issue, but before my first treatment, my chiropractor advised me that it wasn't unusual for "a surprise" eruption and that if it did happen that I should not be embarrassed by it. "You'd be surprised who's gassed me," he said, which made me laugh and (almost) quit worrying about it. Fortunately it never happened. :)

    So happy you're seeing progress!

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  8. I'm glad you are making improvements--that is good news! Little by little, you will get there. :) I've only seen those water massage thingies at the mall--ha!

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  9. Bwahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaa!!! This post was hysterical, and I'm glad to know you are heading towards the mend!

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