Friday, December 28, 2012
Cheese and Whine
I'm on day 3 of the Christmas cold. Colds aren't usually too big of an issue for me because I feel relief when I stand up to exercise. Oh yeah, that's right. I can't stand up to exercise for the foreseeable future. I'm a weepy mess. Everything I read on the internet about Tarsal Tunnel Syndrome offers little hope and even the last resort of surgery has very mixed results sometimes making the original pain seem like a cake walk. Hell even cortisone shots can end up doing nerve damage! So I do searches like "can people recover from Tarsal Tunnel Syndrome without surgery" and just end up on sites with horrendous pictures of gaping surgery visuals. Or you'll have sites that tell you the conservative therapy (ice, elevation, rest, anti-inflammatories, etc) but no time frame for recovery.
We had to cancel our New Years Eve plans in Chicago. I was cleared by the podiatrist to go but only if I taped up my foot. Well, taping up my foot pinches the nerves and makes it worse. I can barely stand long enough to make my lunches so walking 3-5 miles per day is out of the question. I begin wondering if our summer trip to Hawaii is going to be an issue. I pray it's not. I pray I'm healed by then. The 2 weeks of altering are coming to a frustrating end and while I'm not limping, the soreness I wake up with or the little nerve firings are enough to sink me back into a slight depression.
We have an ultrasound thingy coming that will hopefully help. Several sites say it speeds healing. I hope so. I don't even want to go back to the over the top workouts. I'd be happy adding back in Walk Away the Pounds! At this point, low impact Turbo Fire seems like an impossible dream. I never thought I'd envy people running onstage after 'coming on down' on The Price is Right or even grocery shopping. I had to send the Mr alone last Sunday because I knew it wasn't in the cards. I mean how pathetic I just want to go on a normal grocery run?
I would be insane by now if it weren't for the Mr. He has really been wonderful and has put up with my daily crying jags. I'm trying to be strong but I'm so weak. I told him I just want to lay in bed all day in his arms and weep. What a wonderful way for a man to spend a day. I'm trying to reward him for all of his help by watching Total Recall for the first time. You know, the real one from the 80's in which everyone are horrible actors? (Though I hear the reboot is about the same) But I'm trying to take it like a champ because my honey has been as well over the past week or so.
I don't know what source of inspiration I can really be to anyone right now. I'd ask you guys to hang in with me but I honestly don't know how long this recovery will take. I don't know if I can stand long enough to try out and photograph new recipes without undoing healing. So there is my cheese and whine. I really feel like I'm letting you guys down. I try to be strong but this has truly beaten me down mentally and physically.
Have you had an injury that felt like it would never heal? How did you get through the low points?
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